My Age Doesn’t Matter But Getting Old Does

By John Kuykendall

Well, it’s that time of year again, as much as I hate to admit it, I will soon be another year older. Don’t ask my age because it really doesn’t matter and I’m not sure I remember any way. It’s been a lot of years since my mother brought me into this world and that is the one thing I do know and assure I can feel.
Each day brings a new surprise. As a kid I loved surprises because usually it meant you were going to get something good. Now, I’m surprised every day when I wake and feel a new pain somewhere in my body. After a little while, you just get used to it and go on about your business.
About the only good thing I know about growing old is that all my dark secrets are safe with my friends. That’s because not one of them can remember those secrets.
Seriously though, growing old is not that bad if you don’t mind have the eyesight of a mole in the daylight, the hearing of a young man that shot a triple barrel shotgun without any ear protection, and pain in almost every part of your body.
There’s all the medications to. Let’s not forget them. We take medicines to wake up, medicines before we eat, medicines after we eat, medicine between meals and medicines at bed time. The really sad part is that we are not sure what all the medicines are for, we can’t remember.
When we start aging the first thing that happens is that we receive free hair highlights. Some people call them wisdom highlights, or as they are commonly known… gray hairs.
The second thing you will notice is that your eyes begin to play tricks on you. The vision begins to change almost monthly, then come the bifocals, to trifocals, to the cataracts and surgery and back to the bifocals.
I haven’t experienced hearing aids just yet, but I’ve noticed the volume on my television is low and I can’t understand why when I have it set at 85 to 90. Last week, I set it at 100 and the dang people in the show kept mumbling and I still couldn’t make out what they were saying. Dumb actors.
As I grow older I also notice that things are really beginning to click for me. Don’t believe me, just listen when I move and you can hear my neck, back, arms clicking and when I walk my knees sound like someone is playing maracas.
A friend of mine once told me that I need to embrace my age and just grow old gracefully. Growing old gracefully is just a king way of saying you look like a prune and each daily your looks are slowly getting worse.
I won’t get into the fact that when you get older how hard it is to sit on the toilet, but sitting down is not half as bad as trying to get up.
Of course, at my age you need one of those walk in tubs and showers so you don’t have to bend those old hurting knees. But having one won’t matter much. in a few more years when I’ll need a chair to sit on to take a bath anyway.
Have you ever heard someone say growing old ain’t easy? Growing old is easy but an old body doesn’t make it easy.
I read something once that said people of age have emotional well-being. According to what I read, older folks are suppose to have emotional stability, can cope with stress and adversity better than younger folks. Whoever wrote that stupid stuff doesn’t have to pay the medical bills of us older folks, buy the 25 prescriptions we need each month or the IRS without dependents or deductions. I’m sure it was written by someone in their late 20s or early 30s.
Seriously though, growing old does have it’s advantages, but for the life of me I can’t remember what they are. Oh yeah, I forgot to mention that memory is a problem when you get older as well.
So, when you hear that growing old beats the alternative… don’t believe it. That old saying what goes up must come down don’t apply to old age because age never goes down.
But truthfully, God has blessed me to keep me going and allowing me to live to get older and I’m thankful for every day He gives me.